As anyone who read my last blog knows, I have been obsessed with the Olympics in Rio this year. It’s been an incredible spectator sport of human spirit at its most inspiring level. One spontaneous comment during an interview keeps playing over in my mind as a lesson in perspective.
A conversation with Kerri Walsh-Jennings, one half of the women’s beach volleyball team, was the backdrop. As she sat alongside her partner, April Ross, the two were asked how they felt about not winning first place as expected. Her response was priceless. She smiled and said they didn’t lose gold, they won bronze.
What a great reminder that so much of what we experience in life is all in our perspective.
The hype building up to the games was around her previous three gold medals in this event. Every reporter reminded us that she has been unstoppable in the Olympics, never losing a match. It was evident that there is more pressure in defending a title than going in with nothing to lose.
Let me back up a step. When they lost their semi-final match, taking away their shot at gold, they were understandably shocked and disappointed. However the true mark of character isn’t what you do when you’re on top, but how you respond when you fall.
After congratulating the prevailing Brazilian team, Walsh-Jennings proceeded to run all around the court to high-five every person who helped run the game. It didn’t matter what their job was, she gave each an equally big smile and sincere thank-you.
This was after midnight, since the game was played late in the evening under the stars, with the help of bright stadium lights set up around their beach court. They had less than twenty-four hours to pick themselves up and re-focus for their next game – to see whether or not they would take home any medal at all.
Still shaken from the first lost match in her Olympic history, they lost their first set to another Brazilian team. But they didn’t dwell on what was behind them or become paralyzed by the “what-ifs” ahead. Even when they errored, the pair came together after each setback to inspire one another for the next play.
Then Walsh-Jennings did what she once stated she works hard to practice in her life, and that is living in the moment. Not feeling weighed down by past “what could have been”s, and instead being present in the opportunity of now.
They stayed in that present moment and came back to win the next two sets, capturing the bronze medal. She immediately said it was the hardest game she had ever played. Later adding that it was the mental and emotional aspects that made it so challenging.
Less than eight hours later, in the early morning hours, they was interviewed on camera about their experience. She pointed out the word “joy” she writes on her hand going into each match, to remind her why she is here and what the most important aspect of the game is to her.
And that is when she said those stirring words. They didn’t lose gold….. they won bronze.
She admitted that this outlook wasn’t immediate. It was an unfamiliar epiphany, since she had never before been faced with her glass half empty on the Olympic stage. But if we can learn the lesson, it’s that it isn’t our goal destination that forms who we are, but rather how we think and what we do along our journey to get there.
It was a reminder that a glass half-full perspective isn’t just a quality you have or don’t have. It’s one we are all capable of if we re-train ourselves to keep focus on the now, and practice finding the silver-lining in every situation. Keep practicing.
It’s not about the winning, though winning is always nice. It’s about finding what gives you joy, and then finding that joy in everything you do. It’s about teaching yourself to live in the present moment, safe from the ruminations of the past and worries of the future. It’s tuning your perspective to look for the positive, especially when its not easy to find.