I ran into the house from the mailbox giddy with excitement, waiving the cardboard envelope in front of my husband. It is extremely unusual for me to even check the mailbox, as it usually ends up containing only homework – bills go into the “too stressful, so I’ll deal with you later pile” and everything else goes straight into the recycle bin. But today I felt like Willy Wonka and I had just found the Golden Ticket! “We’re going to be a Nielsen Family!” I exclaimed.
Have you ever wondered why your favorite television show could get cancelled when you obviously watch it every single week? It can feel very personal – as if you are losing people who play an important role in your own life. The rationale is always something about low ratings – which makes you feel like your opinion doesn’t count if you are one of the many who ARE watching it.
Whenever this happens, it typically sets me off into a rant about “if only I could be a Nielsen household” to prove to them which shows deserve to get renewed. (FYI, those would be MY shows.) I always wondered how they were chosen – those elusive Nielsen Households. In all my years I have never met anyone from one, nor have I even ever met someone who knew someone who was in one. We’re told they exist – but how representative could they be if one has never been spotted?
Well what you know, I thought, they DO exist! And for one week I get to be one! I was already planning what shows I would watch this week, what shows I would let my husband watch, what we would wear to watch them (just in case Nielsen showed up to interview us) and how awesome it will be now that all of our shows will get renewed.
My husband logically reminded me that there are probably lots of people doing this every week, so not to get my hopes up too much that I alone would be coloring the fall line-up picture. Maybe so, but they were going to listen to me this time. Even if mine is just one voice in a chorus of many – my voice is still in there. I felt like Steve Martin in “the Jerk” when he runs around screaming “I’m somebody now!” when he saw his name in a phone book for the first time.
So apparently they have two methods of data collection. For one, houses get a high-tech gadget hooked to their set that sends real-time information about what channels you have on at what times and for how long. The second is a low-tech ”tv viewing diary” that you write in this same info, but with the addition of WHO is watching at each of these times.
It is this second way that gives them the demographic info. I immediately sat down to fill out the questionnaire at the beginning of the diary when one of the questions stopped me in my tracks. How many members of your household are in each of the following age groups? I realize my age is in a higher group than my husband. I’m only three years older, but having to check off different boxes makes it feel a bit more painful. This isn’t getting off to a good start.
I tried to focus on the positives, so then moved on to the happy thought of writing about my experience here in this blog. As I continue to read their introduction letter I come to the request that we do not discuss our role in this research with anyone outside the household – including social media. Maybe they think there is a black-market in the seedy underworld of tv ratings and I could be bribed to write in someone else’s favorite shows. I convince myself that a website blog is different from facebook or twitter, and that no one probably reads my stuff anyway.
It’s hard not to watch t.v. a little differently when you know it counts. Is it really worth trying out this new show when it might not be worthy of my points? I tell my husband he shouldn’t use up time that will count on any show that isn’t mutually loved and agreed upon. And we better not channel surf to see if there’s anything better on, just stick with what we know and like, even if it’s a repeat we’ve seen a dozen times already. This isn’t a game, I try to tell him, our shows are depending on us this week.
When I learn that watching the shows a few days later from the DVR may not count as much, I have to revise the rest of the week’s show-watching game-plan. They must know people fast forward through the commercials. I start piecing together that maybe the ratings matter to them more because it affects how much advertisers have to pay for their slots, and if you aren’t watching the ads……. We huddle – if only I had a white board to draw out our mid-game strategy. We have to make the rest of these days count, I tell him. For the next few days, we watch our shows real-time, in the moment. (Silence….. while the weight of this new situation sinks in.)
All of a sudden recording shows in the diary feels like a desired commodity that can be used as leverage. The holder of the pen becomes the ruler of the seven kingdoms! I find myself bartering with it as currency. “If you take out the trash, we can watch one of your shows, and I will write it in the book”. You see, dear reader, it has transformed from a mere diary to a holy grail, if you will. It is now “the book” and holds great power. (Maybe there really is a dark side to t.v. ratings!)
I look back over the week and it’s funny how much television you watch that you don’t even realize. It’s like keeping a food diary, reflecting back to you all that felt so good in the moment, but looks regretful in the light of hindsight. I laugh looking at Sunday, wondering how we found time to eat or go to the bathroom when we apparently sat in front of the tube for hours watching Game of Thrones.
But we had to, we try to console ourselves. You HAVE to re-watch last week’s episode so you get back in the right mindset and don’t forget any details from where we left off. Then you watch this week’s episode. Then you HAVE to re-watch the new one we JUST saw to make sure we didn’t miss any details, and to process what we have just experienced. It doesn’t feel like we’ve been sitting too long when we’re exhausted from traveling to so many distant lands and still recovering from the emotional roller-coaster.
It brings me back full circle to thinking about t.v. characters being part of our social network. Even if a show is coming back, but is on break until the new season, you feel the empty hole at that day and time, where those people should be. And when you wake up and know your special show is on that night, it makes the whole day somehow seem a bit more exciting, as it fills you with anticipation.
You discuss their events with your family and friends just like you would if they were a part of your real-life inner circle. It’s instantly bonding if you realize someone you didn’t know well watches your show too because you now share the same extended show-character social network after all. Maybe that’s all we need for world peace….. to all sit together watching Game of Thrones, eating pizza, and analyzing our theories about Jon Snow, Daenerys and Tyrion.
Television IS personal. And it sure feels good to have your opinions heard. Thanks for listening Nielsen. And by the way….. how do I go about getting one of those gadgets to track our shows EVERY week? (I rhythmically tap my fingers together pondering….. with a soft and surprisingly sinister laugh.)